Who is Matt Olson and What Does He Do?

The league has seen a proliferation of young power this year unmatched since the history of time itself. Bellinger and Judge are the obvious go-to’s in this regard. So, since we’re a totally unique and off-the-wall publication, we’re going to tell you about someone you may not have heard of that fits into this category. And we’ll do this in the classiest way possible.

Who the %$#@ is Matt Olson?!

Matt Olson

Oh, that’s Matt Olson.

We don’t even know where to start with this guy because, frankly, it’s outrageous. He was born in 1994 and it appears he’s trying to hit that many dingers in his career at the rate he is slugging. In just 70 games in an Oakland Athletics uniform, this man has hit 24 jacks in 210 ABs. That’s good for a career 8.75 AB/HR number. Remember that number, you’re going to need it in a moment. (Look, we know you aren’t smart but just do it. You can forget it in a paragraph.)

Just to put those numbers into perspective, let’s compare him to those other two dudes that you are probably already afraid to lose your wife to: Bellinger and Judge. Bellinger is currently looking at a career 11.9 AB/HR mark while Judge has a career 11.3 AB/HR. We’re no mathematicians but it looks like – hold on, double checking…carry the three – yes, Olson has the best AB/HR rate!

So, then who the heck is this guy!? Well, he certainly isn’t Bryce Harper, Mike Trout, Cody Bellinger, or Aaron Judge because, if he was, you would know about him. The MLB’s social media pages are covered in those four faces.

Matt Olson is, for lack of a better term, an absolute animal. Born in Atlanta, Georgia, the A’s picked Olson in the 1st Round of the 2012 draft out of high school. Four years later, he’s technically the best power hitter on Planet Earth during his stint in The League.

Now, are we surprised? No. The guy stands six-five and weighs 230. And he’s been walloping baseballs at every level of the minor leagues. His homer totals since he began playing on a full season professional roster are 23, 32, 31, 37, and 34. And those numbers are in minor league shorter scheduled seasons, mind you. Dinger numbers like that are perfectly acceptable in a full MLB season.

But this dude was like “Yeah, okay, I’ll just hit 24 in two and half months at the end of the 2017 campaign. It’s cool.” Absolutely bizarre. Could he stand to strikeout a little less? Possibly. He has punched out 60 times in 189 AbBs this year. But ya know what? We don’t care. He’s played 70 games in The Bigs, let the man live.

Also, his stance and swing are awesome.

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The last thing we are going to comment on is how casual the guy is about absolutely mashing. When the dude hits a bomb, it’s utterly majestic. But he takes a trot around the bases like he’s watching grass grow on PBS. Some things are just too easy for some people.

All in all, A’s fans have been right. They started a few campaigns on MLB’s social media pages with the hashtag #PostOlson and they weren’t kidding. Thanks for sharing, Athletics fanatics. You’re a weird bunch but we still like ya. And hopefully the MLB will realize that we want to see all players who are good, not just ones who are on big market teams.

For more on Matt Olson, don’t look anywhere else because this is the best blog of all time and you need to keep reading it. Redirect your attention to one of our other posts, you shmuck.

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